In this world there seems to be be a split of givers and takers.
As we know over the last week, our goal is to come into balance and harmony in our lives. We need to balance the giving and the recieving, not taking. AH, revelation takers are selfish and receiving is balance. So is setting boundaries selfish? This is what we are going to look at today.
As life is a mirror or reflection to show us that which we need to look at within ourselves that causes us to react so to this topic was mirrored to me. I came across a video of a man who was sharing how he was so tired and hurt that in being a good person and helping others, he was continually used and left emotionally hurt and drained. It tugged at my heart as an empath and a giver myself. I don’t know if it was a real or fake video, but the message was clear for me. Then today as I walked by the television I heard a minister ask her audience how many believed being selfish was okay.
This I knew was the message that was going to be written today. For yesterday, I was told that it was important for me to begin to set boundaries, so that as I work in a more expanded way with people I do not allow the Giver/Caretaker energy within me to allow myself to be overwhelmed by takers. For you see it is not selfish to set boundaries or to receive. However, one must balance recieving and giving. I have the giving part down but the receiving or even asking for help has been a problem.
I discussed this a bit in yesterday’s message of how after my Father passed, I fel like I had to be strong and take care of others and didn’t ask for help. I find myself seeing a need a helping a person but not asking for help when I need it and feeling ackward when someone tries to help. In doing so, I am stopping the flow. The other part is that I tend to get connected with takers like this gentleman in the video and a part of me feels guilty to say ‘no’. So, my guides are saying it is time to learn to set boundaries. I am about to learn that lesson well in my life.
What they want me to know that it is not selfish to set boundaries. To do things when it works for you instead of when another demands it. It is not weak to ask for help, for even our teachers and guides are limited in helping us unless we ask. Givers need to take time to replenish their energy.
I need to learn that taking care of myself and my needs is not selfish unless I tend to always put myself before the needs of all others. It is finding the balance of being able to work, be of service, grow spiritually and enjoy life. For we are here to enjoy this beautiful planet upon which we live. Yesterday, we took the afternnon to go to the ocean. It was good and the water always helps to clear the old energies and bring peace and joy. This still left time to do a little work, share a message on my blog, and do some reading and meditating. Balance, I had a client call me that they needed help, in the past this call would have made me feel guilty for taking this time for myself. Instead I simply said I was out of the office and would do it if I got back in time that day or the next.
That may not seem like a big deal to many but for me it was a big step. I am simply taking things one day and event at a time. So balance comes in all forms in order to bring harmony into our lives. We give in service to help others but we need to be aware of takers who are selfish and set boundaries for keeping our mind, body, and emotions in balance, and our lives. We need to learn to recieve, to ask for help from others , and our guides and teachers so that we dont get overwhelmed. This is called self care, not selfishness, unless we expect our guides or others to do everything for us and we fail to put forth any effort to clear, learn and grow.
So, I would tell that man that represented myself, to not stop being a good and caring person who helps others, but to stop and set boundaries. Help others in a way that allows you to care for your needs and find balance in your lfie. Ask for help if you become overwhelmed and it will come. For you are a good person and deserve to receive help as much as you give help. To love yourself is a priority for others to love you in a healthy, and balanced manner.
Remember we attract to us that which vibrates at the same level as ourselves. If we are putting out signals that we are not worthy of receiving but only giving then we will attract the selfish takers. Sometimes it is a need to find validation outside of ourselves that we are a good person, that we make a point of giving in an unbalanced manner to others. Perhaps it feeds our ego when they are appreciative and makes us feel good about ourselves instead of simply doing it because we are all one and in helping another we are helping a part of ourselves and the Creator Source of All Life.
So we need to be aware of our motive in giving and being of service. We need to spend some self time in quiet seeking within to see what is my motivation, and why do I do this? Is it selfless or do I get a reward? Do I need to set boundaries, or clear some old beliefs and emotions? Go into the quiet and ask for help to see and understand. Ask for help to clear any blockages or unbalanced energy. Heal your wounds and balance you mind, body, emotions and spirit. Give to others from a place of service and caring without reward. Yet set boundaries that are healthy for yourself so that you do not become overwhelmed.
Remember you don’t have to do it all yourself. Ask, whether it be from your guides or from another person for help yourself. You need to balance giving and receiving to grow spiritually.
I Am Mareya Shimayah Elohim
Oracle of Divine Grace 