Tag: embodying

Deeper Dive into Personal Integrity

For myself, I try always to self-examine and self-reflect when something gives me pause. It may come through world events, my spiritual journey, questions of personal integrity, or simply something that causes me to stop and wonder.

I have been doing some clearing lately, both internally and externally, and during this time something came up that caused me to reflect more deeply.

Someone left a simple comment on one of my posts:

“Actor?”

I didn’t understand what they meant, so I asked. I received no response.

Since I am always open to examining my words, what I share, and even my own integrity, I decided to explore the possibilities of what that question might mean.

Why?

Because when I share my journey, I try to be truthful about my experiences, my realizations, my faults, and even the places where I have struggled.

I do not always immediately succeed in aligning with or embodying a new understanding. I share that too, because I hope it helps others recognize that this is a process. We are not expected to suddenly become perfect because we have received a new realization. We are simply asked to do the best we can each day to live what we have come to understand.

So I asked myself:

Am I acting? Am I saying one thing while failing to do my best to embody the truths I share?

As I reflected, I knew the answer.

I am trying every day.

Some days I do better than others. Some days I recognize my misalignment quickly, while other times it takes longer.

But I am trying.

To me, that means I am not pretending to be something I am not. I am walking through the process of becoming more aligned with what I understand today to be true.

That brought me to another question: What does it mean to live in integrity with our truth?

I realized long ago that truth, as we understand it, can change.

Our truth is often relative to our experiences, beliefs, awareness, and resonance in a particular moment of our journey. What I understood as truth ten or twenty years ago may not be what I understand today.

We can become stagnant and refuse to consider other possibilities, or we can remain open and allow more to be revealed as our understanding deepens and our perspective expands.

I have shared this throughout my writings because my journey has continually changed me—and as I have changed, so has my understanding.

I do not expect anyone to believe as I do.

Each of us has to discover our own truth in the moment we are living. If we remain open to deeper understanding, new doors may open and reveal something we were not previously able to see.

I am on this journey with you.

I am not here to tell anyone what to believe or how their journey should unfold. I simply share some of what I experience and the possibilities I discover along the way, in case something within them might be helpful to someone else.

Then another thought arose.

Is the process of embodiment, in some ways, like being an actor?

Perhaps we first receive a “script” describing what it means to live as our Presence. Then we begin practicing the words, the qualities, and the way of Being until eventually they are no longer something we are consciously trying to remember.

They become part of us.

For instance, I have sometimes been given three virtues at a time to work with more deeply in my daily life.

That caused me to wonder:

Should I act more peaceful, more patient, or more allowing even when that is not what I am feeling inside?

The answer was not as simple as I first thought.

For me, it begins with mindfulness.

When I recognize that I am no longer peaceful or centered, I can consciously return to that inner place of stillness. From there, I can look at what has caused me to feel out of balance or out of alignment.

I can acknowledge it.

I can work with it.

I can clear what is ready to be released.

Then, as the energy shifts, I am able to return naturally to the flow.

Sometimes this happens quickly. Other times it takes considerably longer.

But I have realized that the transformation begins with the simple recognition:

I am out of alignment, and I choose to return.

Perhaps that is the difference between pretending to embody a virtue and practicing embodiment.

Pretending says, I must appear peaceful even though I am not.

Practice says, I recognize that I have moved away from peace, and I consciously choose to find my way back to it.

Eventually, through awareness, intention, and practice, what once required conscious effort begins to become our natural resonance.

We are no longer acting peaceful.

We have become more peaceful.

We are no longer acting patient.

Patience begins to live within us.

And perhaps that is how embodiment happens—not through perfection, but through returning again and again until what we practice becomes what we naturally express.

Another lesson I have been learning is not to judge myself so harshly when I fall out of alignment.

Judgment does not help me return.

Awareness does.

Compassion does.

The willingness to begin again does.

So after all of this reflection, I still have no idea what that person meant when they wrote, “Actor?”

But perhaps I no longer need to know.

I am grateful for the question because it caused me to pause, examine myself, and dive more deeply into my understanding of personal integrity and embodiment.

Sometimes even a question we do not understand can become a doorway.

I don’t know whether any of this will resonate with anyone else, but I share it for your own contemplation and discernment.

May your journey become a little lighter as you remember:

You are loved.
You are worthy.
You belong.

Keep moving along the path.

You do not have to see the entire journey from where you stand today.

The path will reveal itself as you walk it.

Digging Deeper

Part 8 – Realization and Peace

This has been an interesting journey. I am deeply thankful both to have experienced it and to have received help in understanding what the experience was revealing.

The unknown can be a frightening place to enter. The mind wants to protect us, and the body responds to that fear. It takes a conscious choice to move through the moment of fear and discover what the unknown may hold.

Along the way, I noticed that the trilogy was not the only expression of three appearing within this journey. On both occasions when I spoke with Isis, she offered three thoughts for me to ponder. The initiation itself brought three aspects of me into conscious Unity.

The pieces began to align. As we embody our Presence, we become a living trinity. The child born of the Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine energies of Creation steps into its birthright.

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The first number upon the card: three aspects becoming One.

The throne and the initiation concerned the meeting of the Presence of my Being with my human self—the unification expressed through the number eight: as above, so below.

That which had appeared to be at odds or in opposition had to be brought into Balance and Harmony. The infinity loop became the embodiment of opposites held within one continuous flow: ∞

I see it as the above and below joining at the center, then reaching outward into the world.

When did this begin? On my seventy-first birthday—an eight.

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The second number upon the card: Presence embodied—as above, so below.

So where do I go from here?

I am completing one period of my life. I release what served me and shaped my focus for so many years, and I open the door to embrace a new beginning.

I heard Isis invite me to embrace this time of freedom from old structures.

This can be a season of wisdom, whether we are women or men. We have seen much and lived much. We can meet life with the patience and peace to witness what is unfolding and allow what is needed to arrive in Divine timing.

This journey of Digging Deeper revealed what had been standing in the way. It also revealed the meaning of the hand I kept placing upon my chest: the invitation to pause, listen within, and ask who was leading.

Although this is my personal story, I believe the invitation within it belongs to all of us.. I believe we have all traveled through many lifetimes and timelines. We each have loving Beings ready to respond when we call, yet we must also be willing to open the door and take our place upon the throne.

For me, this time, it was Isis. She embodies the archetype of the Divine Feminine—an energy deeply needed in the world today.

I spent the first half of my life closely connected with Divine Masculine archetypes. I now realize that I looked to them because I believed they were the ones who could keep me safe and help transform the injustices arising from the lower expressions of duality.

Within each of us, the masculine and feminine aspects of duality may struggle. The Divine Feminine is not returning to take control of the world. She comes to soften the heart so that we may receive the Unity of the Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine within ourselves, bringing greater Balance and Harmony into the world.

Power struggles and control have come through both women and men, although women have historically been more suppressed. At one point in this journey, I sought forgiveness from the Father aspect of the Creator because I had felt abandoned here.

I did not know what I had done wrong—or whether I simply had not done enough. I carried a memory that those in authority would not listen when I tried to warn them about their actions. Everything fell apart, and I was trapped. It felt as though an aspect of me had remained enclosed within a bubble of time, holding a focus to which I had once agreed but did not remember until this year.

That experience imprinted anger toward authority deeply within me—as though it had entered my very DNA. Digging Deeper finally carried the healing to the cellular level. I no longer need the Protector to lead. The Protector is honored and can now walk beside me as we move forward together in peace.

My perspective on world events has shifted.

I also find that the need to do has come into greater balance. Yesterday, something remained on my to-do list. In the past, I would have pushed myself to complete it regardless of how I felt.

This time, I placed it where I could see it and blessed it to be completed from a place of peace rather than demand. Instead, I followed the inspiration to write. I also sat quietly on the porch with the kitties and my husband, simply enjoying the day.

New ideas began to flow, but I am taking baby steps.

You see, there is all the time in the world—but not a moment to waste.

I no longer hear my mother’s voice saying, “If you cannot find something to do, just ask, and I will show you what to do.”

I understand Isis—as I understand any guide, teacher, or guardian angel—to be an expression of consciousness offering a path and perspective they know well when we ask. Yet I had to ask, and I also had to give my conscious consent to bring the Presence of my Being and my human mind into Unity.

My mind is quieter now. The urgency is gone.

I will meet each moment and each event in the now.

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Completion and new beginnings: the former cycle released, the new left open.

The oracle card has now revealed itself.

I am at Peace.

I am open to what comes next, but I have no need to seek it out.

I know it will come when the time is right.

When Grounding Feels Heavy: Remembering the Return of Magic

The grounded Mystic.

When Grounding Feels Heavy: Remembering the Return of Magic

There was a moment of realization that came quietly, but with clarity.

For weeks, my thoughts had felt foggy.
Inspiration had softened, and the joy of exploring, learning, and sharing had faded into something that felt more like obligation than wonder.

At first, I could not name it.

But this morning, I saw it clearly.

In my focus on embodiment, I had leaned deeply into grounding.
Into presence.
Into being here, in the body, in the earth.

And while this was necessary… something had been left behind.

The magic.

Grounding is often spoken of as the answer.
A way to stabilize, to anchor, to come fully into the present moment.

But grounding, on its own, is not the whole.

When it stands alone for too long, it can begin to feel heavy.
Dense.
Even dull.

Not because grounding is wrong…

but because it was never meant to exist without its counterpart.

There is a natural balance within us:

The Earth… and the Sky.
The Body… and the Breath of inspiration.
Presence… and Wonder.

When these move together, life feels alive.

When one is emphasized without the other, something begins to dim.

What I experienced was not a loss of inspiration.

It was an overcorrection.

A deep anchoring into the physical, without allowing the lightness of curiosity and exploration to continue flowing through it.

And so, life began to feel like something to manage… rather than something to experience.

The return was simple.

Not through effort.
Not through trying to “fix” anything.

But through allowing curiosity back in.

A small question:

What feels interesting right now?

Not productive.
Not necessary.
Simply… interesting.

In that moment, something shifted.

The breath softened.
The mind opened.
And a quiet sense of aliveness began to return.

Not dramatically.

But gently… naturally.

I began to understand:

Magic is not separate from grounding.

It is what moves through it.

It is the light that gives presence its warmth.
The curiosity that gives embodiment its joy.

We are not meant to live only in stillness.

We are meant to be participants in life.

To explore.
To feel.
To follow what calls to us, even in the smallest ways.

Now, I return to a simple rhythm:

I ground into the moment…
and I allow curiosity to guide me within it.

I anchor…
and I explore.

I am present…
and I remain open.

And in that balance…

life begins to unfold again.

With ease.
With quiet guidance.
With a sense that I am not pushing forward…

but walking with something that is already moving.

If you have been feeling the weight of “doing everything right”…
if grounding has begun to feel more like effort than peace…

perhaps nothing has gone wrong.

Perhaps you are simply being invited to remember:

You are allowed to feel wonder again.

You are allowed to follow what feels light.

You are allowed to live your embodiment… not just hold it.

Return to the heart.
Allow the breath.
Follow what feels alive.

And let life unfold.