Let us look at and heal the small child within the closet we hold within ourselves.
First, let me state that if you are having serious emotional distress in your life that which I will speak of is not intended to replace your seeking of licensed professional medical or psychiatric help.
This is about your spiritual journey and the pain we have walled within our being from our childhood. There are very few people, unless they have worked with this energy or have had licensed counseling, who do not have some pain trapped within them from their life. It doesn’t necessarily have to have come from your childhood, it could be teenage, young adult, or adulthood physical, mental or emotional trauma.
I speak of it as the inner child trauma because when we are in pain or face intense challenges there is a trigger within us of fight or flight. This is like a child who hides from a challenge or pain to feel safe. I don’t know what a professional psychiatrist would say about this but I have found that at some point in our childhood, we experience a hurt or pain that makes us feel bad or scared. In that moment as a small child we create a safe space within ourselves to which we retreat from the pain and we build a wall or close a door in order to keep out the ones who frighten us or cause us pain. As an adult, when we flee often it is not a physical flight but a movement within us emotionally and mentally to a place within where we as a child have created a safe space.
This is a place where we can cry and hope to remain safe. A part of us has felt that we must not be good or worthy or what we experienced would not have happened. So we can hide that unworthy part, the fearful part of ourselves here where no one can see it and we don’t have to deal with the pain. Then we put a smile on our face and keep going. If we don’t face that unworthy part of ourself then it doesn’t exist. We can now tell ourselves that we are strong and put forth a face an energy of self confidence on the outside, for we have contained that hurt part within the walls.
Yet, this walled part of ourselves keeps us from fully loving ourself and feeling worthy of the love of others. It keeps us from being whole emotionally and mentally. It prevents us from fully manifesting the perfection that we truly are as a soul living in this physical form. It keeps us from knowing that we are able to embrace the concept that we are a part of all creation, a co creator of our reality. It prevents us from embracing the perfection of our being and expressing if fully.
We are an expression of the Universal Oneness of Creation. We are here to experience, learn, expand and create a better world for All Life.
So what do we do?
We begin by acknowledging that it is possible that we have this within ourselves. Then we need to be willing to look at the pain and fear within us. When we are ready we have choices, you can seek professional psychiatric counseling who can help you to find a safe way in which to approach and look at this pain. You can work with a hypnotherapist who can guide you within to look behind the walls you have built and connect with your inner child . There is also guided meditation and or meditation on your own to go within. You will also find many spiritual counselors or courses on line. There is also ministerial counseling. Which you choose is up to you.
However, at some point you must look at this pain and open the door or you will continue be stalled and bump up against this wall in your life and spiritual process.
It may be difficult to do this own your own and you may want to begin with guided meditations. Why do I say this? Because it is hard to not want to turn away when we approach this wall or door to the room and to face the pain within it. It may be easier to just let the ego mind take you out of the process. In a guided meditation at least you have the voice of another which continues to prompt you to move forward and you can focus on that voice instead of your ego mind. You ego mind is in the flight mode to protect you from further hurt it is not your enemy but it must not be your ruling force in life.
Your soul which you connect with in your heart leads you to freedom not your ego mind. You ego mind was created to keep your form safe, to determine how to function in the daily tasks of life and to do this under the direction of the soul. However, part of the earth program is spiritual amnesia in which we forget we are a part of the Universal Oneness and think we are a small separate individual who must struggle to survive in a world full of people and challenges that would hurt us. The idea is that when we focus upon our spirituality and turn within, then we remember and the amnesia dissipates. Then we can reclaim who we truly are as a Soul living in a human form.
This is why we must at some point look at the pain we have hidden within that which I am terming the inner child. I do this because most often it appears to us a small child or younger version of ourselves when we connect, who is huddled in the darkness and crying in pain.
The method I use in my meditation to connect is to move into my heart center. I focus my attention and inner vision upon the center of my chest where my heart chakra exists. I visualize walking deep within until I see a wall. I walk around to see if there is a door, if not I climb over the wall. On the other side is either a dark space or a room with a door. If there is a door I open it and go inside. In either of these, I will ask for a light to shine. Usually you will have heard someone crying or moving inside. When the light shines you will see them. Move towards them and introduce yourself and ask them what is wrong. Tell them you are here to help and listen to them. Then sit beside them and listen.
Reassure them that they are not alone anymore for you are there to help them. Ask them if it is okay for you to hug them and then do so. Ask if there is something you can do to help in this moment and listen. Then again reassure them that you are them and they have made it this far and together you will heal this pain to be even stronger.
Ask that the violet fire of transmutation will take this pain, the cause, core memory, record and effect from your Being to the source of it origin and to the subatomic cellular level. Ask that forgiveness for anyone who has hurt you both will fill your being and that you be forgiven from anyone that you have hurt in this situation that they will forgive you. Share your love with this part of you and feel them merge with you and reunite with you whole again.
As you have merged you can now in the light move out of the room or the walled area for the door is open or the wall gone and the lights are on. You can now come forth from your meditation with the focus that you are now free of this pain.
This does not mean that you may not have other pain that you have walled within from other instances and ages of your life still within and you may need to do this process more than once. For our pain even on a single area may have layers like an onion that need to be peeled away for they have resurfaced at differing times in our lives in different ways that have created a unique scar within us. There can also be entirely different topics of pain trapped in that room. A child may have the pain of being told they are bad, and the teenage may have the pain of saying being rejected by their peers and told they are weird, a young adult is rejected by someone they want to date, an adult has a spouse who cheats on them.
Each of these could be part of that childhood trauma of being told they are bad. Creating actions in their lives based on a belief that they are not good or worthy of love and affection that allows others to treat them badly. These are the effect of the core memory of the original event. The one journey can clear all of these and sometimes, we are not fully ready to let go of one of the legs of the effect. For instance, the spouse has recently cheated and it still hurts and we need to go back in and look at this pain which we feel as an adult. Don’t hesitate to do this process as many times as needed until you walk inside your heart and find there are no walls and no darkness.
During this process, always before you meditate, ask for protection. Archangel Michael will happily place you in his blue pyramid of protection. Please, ask for the highest light and energies possible to be with you. When you are entering your heart chakra it is always nice to ask Archangel Chamuel who is the protector of the Heart Charka to be with you and help you to release all pain. In addition, Archangels who can help in this process could be the Archangels who work with forgiveness. They are Archangels who deal with our Soul Star Chakra called Archangel Mariel and Archangel Lavender. They help us to forgive and to seek those who need to forgive us and ask them to do so. If you don’t believe in Archangels it is fine. Angels are in essence not winged beings but energy aspects of Creation which bring a particular aspect of energy to us when called upon and help us to feel connected to that energy.
May you find clarity in this process. If one suggestion doesn’t work try another to find what works best for you. Sometimes it helps to connect personally with someone to talk about things. We are all different and our journey and needs unique to us. Don’t give up if something doesn’t work keep trying it is worth it to be Free and Whole again.
I will be offering a guided meditation mp3 of this soon on my etsy site. If you are interested please email and I will let you know when available. IF you have any questions or there is something I can help with please email.
oracleofdivinegrace@oracleofdivinegrace
Blessings on your journey to freedom.
I AM Mareya Shimayah Elohim.
Oracle of Divine Grace 