inner parent – Oracle of Divine Grace

Navigating Inner Turmoil: A Journey of Self-Reflection

This has been a day of self reflection and understanding. I journaled my first thoughts about this sharing 11 hours ago. I realized that there was something I was missing in my early reflections. So,I busied myself to avoid going within to learn the answers.

I will begin with the situations and my early thoughts while journaling upon awakening. The last two days, I found myself getting irriatated at things that didn’t go my way. Usually I can go with the flow and that has seemed to be the mantra of my guides lately. Go with the flow, go with the flow. So, perhaps they were aware of the energies coming and trying to warn me. (This just came to me as I am writing.)

I found myself falling into old patterns which I thought I had overcome in regards to my neighbor who wanted to gossip and getting short with her. I could have handled it better in setting boundaries with her, than to let it irritate me but, I didn’t. I found my muggle work being very frustrating and causing irritability. I got upset over little things, but mainly my inability to be in control and balanced.

I thought this morning, how can I expect anyone to believe anything I share when I can’t consistently manifest and live my own truth. I felt like I should just stop sharing until I can fully manifest on a consistent basis what I share. I felt a failure.

At that point I heard that my sharing is telling my story of my journey and what I am learning and how I am learning. I do this not because my path and truth are the only path and truth, but to help others to understand spiritual growth is a path. Like learning to walk, one step at a time, we fall down and get up and take another step. The child doesn’t quit trying because they fall down. They don’t worry when someone laughs when they fall.

I sensed that in part there was something going on in the collective and I was feeling it and not protecting myself enough. A few months ago the Council of Light from Saturn gave permission for Archangel Michael that, when we ask, in addition to the blue light of protection he provides to us he could place a blue pyramid over the minds of individuals. This pyramid blocks the input of the systems of control from the collective consciousness. I heard to be very conscious of doing this and to ask for help in more fully disconnecting from the collective consciousness. The Council of Light determines what is in alignment to the overall plan for the Universe and Free will choices.

I was reminded also of the stray cat that came about the same time as I began my stressful and irritating period. It is injured and I want to help it but it runs away to protect itself. Much like me getting irritated by others to protect myself. I am trying to help the kitty and feeling bad because it isn’t working. When I attempt to get close I scare it so I can’t help it. I was wondering what was going on with the timing. (P.S. the kitty’s leg seemed bent like it was dislocated which was so worrying, but today it was straight again, but still avoiding me)

So, I didn’t type this blog, in the morning and as I said I busied myself cleaning, self care and reading to avoid the quiet and what my inner self wanted to tell me. I noticed a reminder on my computer that Neptune had gone retrograde into Aries beginning yesterday, March 29,2025, for the next 14 year. Then I decided to go outside and sit with the other kitties.

While sitting quietly I heard that it is not my higher self telling me I had been bad, but my ego.

The ego’s purpose being to keep us happy and safe. If we are feeling bad or scared the ego does what it thinks best on the physical level to keep us in status quo. Since our parents protected us by disciplining us when we did something bad, the inner parent is triggered by the ego to do the same. If it can convince me to stop sharing, then I don’t need to feel bad about myself.

I was reminded, as I said that my path and truth are not the only path and truth. Some of what I share you may agree with and some you may not. We are all on our own unique path and learning process. We have each experienced many things in many lives and we have specific aspects of all the possibilities that we are attempting to learn and experience in this life, along with karma to clear.

Many teachers in the past taught in sacred texts through parables or stories because we can more easily learn and understand something if we can see the real life application rather than a scientific treatise. So if something helps you or clicks with your great, if not, let it go and maybe tomorrow, or another person will have what you are seeking.

The final piece of this story is when I came back in I decided to look at the Neptune is Aries situation to see if it meant something since it happened about the same time as this all began for me. Neptune is the planet in our solar system that is part of a group that is bringing Wisdom and Energy for Ascension from Source to Earth and Humanity. It went retrograde which is interesting because we just came out of the inbreath of Source. Which occurred from 2012 to 2023. The in breath a time of evaluation and return to Source of that which is completed or unable to move forward into the next outbreath of creation.

We are in year 2 of a 9 year period of the rest between breaths of Source. At the end of the 9th year of rest in 2032 we begin a new creative period of the outbreath of Source. Some refer to this as the New Golden Age.

Neptune had been in Pisces representing a period of spiritual growth, embracing compassion and emotional healing. Neptune is about dreams, higher consciousness, intuition and transformation. These aspects of ourselves are moving from the womb of nurturing and healing which is the feminine aspect represent by Pisces. It has went retrograde or backwards into the masculine aspect of Aries.

Now we are in the 14 years of Aries, which is considered a warrior energy. This is a period where we learn to stand up for our truth in light and compassion. To let go of that which doesn’t serve our higher purpose in order to manifest it in our lives. Neptune in Aries is about breaking from tradition to find and live our individual truth and path with courage. It is about bravery, leadership, initiative to step out of our comfort zone and trust in our inner abilities to manifest that which we came to do.

I realize that other people, situations or events that have irritated me in the last few days have been obligations that although one may be of a good purpose are not fulfilling my higher purpose and direction. The irritation is with myself allowing them to take my time and energy that I could use for other purposes. I need to reevaluate my boundaries without getting irritated, but doing so with understanding. I need to set my goals and work towards them while having loving compassion for myself needing time to rest and decompress.

So Neptune in Aries isn’t an excuse to be irritated with others. What I do now understand is that sometimes things that happen have more parts to them than I am aware. I thank my ego for trying to protect me, but I need to take back control from my ego, and to disconnect from the collective consciousness so that what is happening with others doesn’t affect my balance and harmony. I have plenty of my own garbage to deal with and don’t need to take on that of others unless it is my choice to work with clearing it. I need to learn to set boundaries and to decide what I want to do and take steps to move forward. Not with the energy of a bull in a china shop but with the cunning of a lion who knows what it wants and how to do it for the good of its family/pride.

So, this is my journey of discovery today. Always good to see where I need to clear and focus. I must admit in the midst of the revelation it isn’t always so pleasant but it is about how we learn to move forward and try to stay more balanced in the future when events and irritants occur.

Blessings of Light on your path.

Inner Healing: Releasing Guilt, Finding Joy, and Spiritual Path

Guilt is like an onion with many layers that need to be removed before you can get to the source.

I love working with my soul, guides and teachers for it is so en-lightening. The prior blog being keyed by my experience yesterday further nudged me forward by yelling GUILT as I was sitting quietly petting the kitty. I have touched on this topic before but like the onion it is good to look at a new layer of understanding.

Yesterday and the yard work are part of this nudge. I usually work being self employed 6 days, it used to be 7, and then on Sunday I do spiritually reading, classes, videos and blogging. I don’t know when I last had a vacation. There is always so much to be done, between work, the household inside and out, and trying to grow spiritually and do what I have contracted spiritually to be of service. It doesn’t help that I have a built in parental voice that says, idleness is the devil’s work. There is something that needs done, do it. Don’t waste time. Time is money. If you don’t do it, who will?

So my three days off involve, doing yard work, creating mp3 and completing some classes and videos I haven’t watched. Even those last 2 are indulgences since, I have dusting, sorting, and sewing that needs done. GUILT – supersized.

So I as I was eating breakfast I asked if there was something I should look at and I have realized Jesus really likes ‘Illusions’ because he told me to just open it up and see what it says. So, of course, I opened it to a section that as I began to read spoke of Guilt. Richard has been asking Don about why he quit being a Messiah. During the night Richard has a dream that showed the crowds following Don but not really listening to what he said or actually making it applicable in their lives. So one day he Quit. He just disappeared. Richard remembered reading about it. It had been front page news : Donald Shimoda, the one they were calling the Mechanic Messiah, the American Messiah, disappeared one day in front of 25,000 witnesses. Richard looked at Donald and he asked , ” Are you allowed? I didn’t know a Messiah could just turn in his keys like that. Aren’t you supposed to save the world.?”

Don answered, ” Of course you can quit. You can quite anything, if your change your mind about doing it. You can quit breathing if you want. ”

The point of what Jesus was trying to show me was that it is the joy of doing the work and service that makes it worthwhile. If it doesn’t bring you joy it is not your hearts calling. Joy and love are not found outside of yourself they are within. That is what Jesus tried to teach that the kingdom is within you. One’s called him the Savior and to him that meant he was a Son of God. He tried to tell people that they were also, but they just wanted the miracles and healing and again as written in the book they didn’t want to change their life to become that which he was sharing.

This teaching isn’t about the life of Jesus, but the teaching in the books that states, Don Shimoda, the Reluctant Messiah, faced the same thing as do many teachers. The people just wanted miracles and healing and not to learn and become the Truth. So, he quit. In reality, we are each our own Savior for the way home is within us. So, he just quit being their example and allowed them to decide for themselves how they would pursue their spiritual path and life.

The key being we have the right to not do something, we don’t have to do it just because it is expected of us or the inner parent feeds us guilt. A good way to work with freeing ourselves of this inner parent voice is to do the Inner Child Healing Meditation. In this we can get to the present life trigger and heal it. The source may actually be past life or ancestral/DNA, but it was triggered in this life by something earlier in our life. You can read that blog and meditation here

https://oracleofdivinegrace.org/?s=inner+child+healing

or I now have an MP3 guided meditation available on etsy.

https://www.etsy.com/shop/violetfireguidance/?etsrc=sdt

I have realized mine was triggered in this life and is Ancestral/DNA so I will be doing an meditation to deal with this on that level. It is time to quit feeling guilty and be able to relax fully. Those things to be done will still be there later.

Namaste

Jesus and

I AM Mareya Shimayah Elohim

Reflections

Seeing from a higher perspective.

In the 1970’s there was a gospel pop song, which became #2 on the billboard charts, it was by Gene MacLellan and called “Put Your Hand in the Hand”. I heard that song this morning in my head and was reminded of a particular line in the song that goes, “Take a look at yourself and you can look at others differently”. It reminded me of a quote from Dr. Wayne Dyer that goes, ” When you change the way you look at things. The things you look at change.” They don’t actually change, it is your perception of them which is changing.

“The shadow is a moral problem that challenges the whole ego-personality, for no one can become conscious of the shadow without considerable moral effort. To become conscious of it involves recognizing the dark aspects of the personality as present and real. This act is the essential condition for any kind of self-knowledge.”

— Carl Jung, Aion (1951)

We all have learned thoughts, beliefs, opinions, judgments about how to act and think, which guide our life. Some call it the inner parent and others the shadow self. We all have said or done things, or even had thoughts that we immediately or later say, why did I think, do or say that. It makes us feel guilty. In order to be the good child/person, we believe we are, we put it away in a box, and it becomes as a shadow.

However, occassionally we will see this same action or words manifesting through another and it repels us. We find ourselves, either retaliating, getting angry or avoiding this person because we are judging them and their actions as incorrect behavior. Yet, within us we know we have done the same thing, if we only acknowledge it ,and that is why it bothers us so much. A part of us says, “So that is how others saw me” and we stuff that image even lower into the box of shadows. On the other hand, we can address it, release and transform the energy.

That is the point when you look at youself and you can see others differently. You will have begun the process of seeing your actions and their actions from a higher perspective. Once we are able to transform and release these old patterns of behavior, the way we look at that same action or words coming from another, we will now view with compassion for the pain within them which brought this forth. Once it no longer bothers us, we are free. For when we see another who is angry, judgmental, lashing out at others, physically or verbally, we no longer react from a place of learned behavior, but we can allow them their emotions, while introducing compassionate energy that will dissipate the emotional reactions and actions, for one cannot carry on a disagreement or argument if no one wants to argue.

Yes, I know this doesn’t apply to war or physical violence and abuse actions. For this I will share a writing by Carl Sandburg, in 1936

The little girl saw her first troop parade and asked,
“What are those?”
“Soldiers.”
“What are soldiers?”
“They are for war. They fight and each tries to kill as many of the other side as he can.”
The girl held still and studied.
“Do you know … I know something?”
“Yes, what is it you know?”
“Sometime they’ll give a war and nobody will come.”

This was later changed in the 1960, era of peace and love, to “What if they gave a war and nobody came.”

Physical and emotional violence and abuse come from many differing sources. Mental and physical abuse and imbalances they have or have experienced in their lives, which leave one unable to control their impulses without medication or forced restraint Perhaps, they have suffered the same in their early childhood and it has become a learned behavior which is acceptable to them. I know it is more complicated and many factors come into the problems, but this is an essence.

Abuse, violence and war are a need for control and power for ones who either feel powerless or they believe they are entitled to hold power and control over others due to their learned rules of what is ethical.

We cannot change another person, we can only look at ourselves and our issues and face them, release them and transform them. When we are no longer adding to the extreme energies of pain and control in the world, we can begin to send love and the violet flame to transform the energies around the world in order to provide breathing space for others to look at what they are doing. We can ask that the Hosts and myriads of Light Beings come in and bring transformational energies into the world to help relieve the pain and suffering caused by unbalanced thoughts, emotions and actions if ones choose to accept their help.

Many think of Archangel Michael as a soldier who kills those who don’t do what God says. In actuality, He is the bringer of DIVINE TRUTH. The sword he carries is the sword of TRUTH. When we are surrounded in TRUTH and LOVE, not shall stand before us in order to harm us.

Once I was taken in meditation by Archangel Michael to a planet in another star system of our Universe. Archangel Michael has been with me all my life. As we stood upon the planet he asked me if I remembered being there with him before. I looked around and suddenly I had a memory of walking with him, and we were radiating Love, Light, Compassion and carrying the Swords of Truth. We did not fight a single being, we simply sent forth these divine energies and spoke the Truth to others. Sharing compassion and help as ones were open, we allowed the Violet Fire of transformation to heal the planet and set the people free. Then a point came where they could do this for themselves and they transformed and freed their world.

I seemed to have gotten side tracked a bit, but not in actuality. All that we see in the world which bothers us is because there is something within us to which we need to look, balance and transform. Otherwise , we would see all the world with the eyes of innocent perception, meaning that all we see and experience in this world is a lesson to be learned for ourselves or another. Often we have come to play the protagonist, agreeing to do so, in order that others can be set free from their judgments and imbalances.

All that exists is part of the Creator which is love, some call this essence adamantine particles. What happened with Archangel Michael was not about loving those who we were the protagonists upon that planet, but to be the Essence of Creation, Love and Being One with the Source of Love the Creator. When Jesus told people to Love their enemies he did not mean they should become weak or passive, but to learn to become who we truly are a part of the Creator, who is the Essence of Creation, Love. Love is not about desires and pleasures, it is about the Essence of Creation, becoming one with it and then the energy of Creation is at your command.

You could turn around a storm by Being the Essence of Love, which would bring you into Unity with the Essence of the Storm and then command it. There is a story in one of the Volumes of “The Life and Teachings of the Masters of the Fart East”, I believe it is volume 3. The essence of the story is that Jesus was at a monastery in a town studying and teaching, during his missing years. Suddenly the town’s people became upset and were running in fear. When he asked what was wrong he was told that the hordes (mongol forces) were coming to loot and destroy the village. Jesus told the people not to fear and he walked to the edge of the cliff where the horde were coming through a pass to climb to the village. When he saw them he raised his hand and the horses bolted, throwing off the riders who fled in fear. He was radiating the essence of Divine Love, no horrible energy of destruction, but when their duality of anger came upon the essence of love, it was like an inpenatrable wall they could not cross.

This brings me back to the words of the young girl, “Sometime they’ll give a war and no one will come.” I read a remark about this quote where someone said that we had to go to war to prevent it from coming to us. Why. because we live in a world of duality and we believe that without guns and instruments of destruction and warriors to fight we will all be killed, so let us kill them first. The truth is that as long as you believe that, you remain powerless and that is your truth.

The moment you step into love, and unity with the Essence and Creator, you can command the elements for you are one with them. You are protected and you have no need to fear another, for they cannot harm you.

“The only thing we have to fear, is fear istself. ” Franklin D Roosevelt

Fear is learned behavior which keeps us limited by our beliefs. When we “LET GO” and Let the Divine within us manifest, we have nothing to fear. We have no need to get mad, to judge another, to abuse or kill for we understand that if they knew better they would not do that which they are doing.

Thus we first must change our perceptions, release and transform our shadows. We do not need fear to face them for they are a part of you that has tried to keep you safe in a dualistic world as best they could. Know you simply need to love them and help those thoughts and beliefs to let go of a need to fear and control. Then as you perceive these traits in others you will come to understand, ‘There but for the Grace of the Creator was I”. Then be love and thankful for now I AM One with the Essence of all LIfe.

Divine Grace is the divine influence which when we turn within for our guidance and direction instead of without, grace operates to transform us, guide us, sanctify our impulses to be more loving and gives us strength to face all challenges with Loving understanding from a higher perspective.

The other part of ourselves that created the shadow is the inner parent or authority figure. All that we believe, our fears and judgments are learned and instilled within us by our parents and authority figures to whom we gave that right to tell us how to think, act and believe. We need to look at those aspects and to take back authority for ourselves and our intent and initative of actions. This restores this authority and initiative to the I AM essence of the Creator who is within us and whom we truly are not the physical body and rational mind. They are merely the tools through which we entered to operate in this world, and are meant to serve the direction and authority of our soul, our I AM Presence, that which is the Essence of Love and Unity with all Life.

So all that we experience is a reflection on the outer of that which exists within us. When we no longer wish to experience the same old thing it is time to look within at ourselves, and begin the process of releasing the past and loving the Essence of who we truly are.

“As a person loves, so they are. As a person believes so they become.”

I Am Moriah Elohim